Yes! I’m about to go full millennial on you.
Because let’s be honest, there is no way I can tell you how to quit your job without referencing that now infamous scene.
We all know the one…
Daniel Cleaver: I just think you should know that there are lots of prospects here for a talented person. Lots of prospects for a person who, you know, perhaps for personal reasons, has been slightly overlooked professionally.
Bridget Jones: Thank you, Daniel. That is very good to know, but if staying here means working within 10 yards of you, frankly, I’d rather have a job wiping Saddam Hussein’s ass.
R-E-S-P-E-C-T
Find out what it means to me.
R-E-S-P-E-C-T
You could argue that Bridget was well within her rights to say what she said. But at the same time, she did flirt her way into that office and start an affair with her boss.
Anyway, it’s clear that Bridget definitely had the confidence to quit. (She had a new job lined up after all.)
But she lacked professionalism. (Although Daniel Cleaver did 100% deserve it.)
So how do you actually quit a job without burning bridges, having a meltdown in the office toilets, or saying something so unhinged your colleagues are still quoting it at the Christmas party a decade later?
Don’t worry, I’ve got you.
This is your practical guide (with timestamps) to leaving with a plan, your dignity intact, and a much smoother exit than our girl Bridget.
Let’s dive in.
P.S. If you’re new here, hey! I’m Thalia. I help 30-something girlies beat burnout and unf*ck their life through 1:1 coaching and self-paced tools. Every week(ish), I share content on burnout recovery, self-development, finding joy, and career growth. Subscribe here so you never miss a debrief.
Signs it’s time to quit your job
Let’s not beat around the bush here. No job is worth losing your sanity over. And I’m telling you this as someone who spent six years clinging to a toxic job, convincing myself it would get better (spoiler: it didn’t).
My 9-to-5 absolutely broke me. To the point where I’d lost who I was.
Yes, quitting your job is hard. But you cannot stay in a job that is making you miserable forever.
It’s not healthy.
Not only will staying in a job that makes you unhappy affect your self-esteem and self-worth, but it’ll also start to negatively impact your personal life.
So if your job is making you:
- Burnt out
- Feel anxious or overwhelmed all the time
- Lose confidence
- Have full-blown nightmares
- Cry at your desk (or in the toilets)
- Drink solo after hours
- Lose sleep
- Wake up in a funk and dread the day
Then you need to quit. Now.
Of course, the signs aren’t always this loud.
Maybe your job is fine on paper, but your gut is telling you it’s time to move on. It’s the same thing. Doing mundane tasks or work that doesn’t align with your strengths will grind you down eventually, too.
So if you’re starting to feel like:
- You’ve outgrown your workload
- You want bigger, more exciting opportunities
- There’s no room for growth in your current role
- You’ve been promised a raise or promotion more than once, and you’re still waiting
- You’re coasting on autopilot and bored out of your mind
- Your skills aren’t being used or challenged
- You can’t picture yourself still doing this in a year
- The work doesn’t fit who you’re becoming anymore
Then it’s the same as before. Quit.
All of these reasons to quit your job are completely valid. Stop listening to people who tell you that you’re “so lucky” or “people would kill for your role”, or “suck it up, no one likes their job.”
If you’re not happy or know you’re capable of so much more — that’s your sign to quit.
How to quit your job
It can be very tempting to romanticise the idea of quitting your job.
We have influencers to thank for that.
But you need to make sure you’re making the right choice for you. This is a big decision and shouldn’t be made impulsively.
There are so many factors to consider, from financial stability to feeling mentally and emotionally ready.
Quitting isn’t as easy as handing in your notice and walking out the very next day. Especially if you want to remain professional and not burn any bridges.
Which is why I’ve broken the whole thing down into a simple framework, so you know exactly what to do and when.
Feel free to change the timeline below to better reflect the industry you’re in, notice period, or personal circumstances.
And if, at any point, you need help, just drop a comment below or email me. I’m here for you.
P.S. I encourage you to save this post (like now!!) so you can come back to it whenever you need to.
12 weeks before quitting: Start applying for new jobs
In this instance, I’m going to tell you to 100% do a Bridget Jones and get yourself a new job before you quit your current one.
Naked quitting is stressful AF, especially in this current climate, and I do not recommend it.
Unless you’re quitting your job to travel, do not skip this step. But obviously, I don’t want you to apply for any old random job just because they’re hiring.
I want you to be intentional about it.
Use this time to reconnect with what you actually want. Get clear on your values, take stock of your strengths, and think about the kind of work that lights you up rather than drains you.
Because the goal isn’t to swap one job for another version of the same thing. It’s to land somewhere that fits who you are now, not who you were when you applied for your current role at 24.
Action steps
- Reconnect with your core values
- Write a “who am I” essay and dive deep into who you are beyond your current job title
- Find your Ikigai — the sweet spot between what you love, what you’re good at, what the world needs, and what you can be paid for
- Get honest about what you’d happily never do again, the tasks, the environments, the type of people, the energy
- Ask yourself the difficult questions about what you really want from life
10 weeks before quitting: Map out a financial game plan
No one (and I mean no one!!) thrives on stress.
So while you’re applying for jobs, I think it’s also a good idea to get radically honest about your financial situation.
Because things don’t always go to plan.
For example, you might find a much better job, but it might pay less. Your company might let you go earlier than expected. Or you might be asked to go on gardening leave.
Setbacks are a part of life.
And there’s no harm in making sure you’re covered financially in case things don’t go as smoothly as you’d like.
Action steps
- Add up your essential monthly outgoings (e.g. rent, bills, food, subscriptions, etc.)
- Aim for a 3-6 month emergency fund before handing in your notice
- Open a separate “leaving fund” and pay yourself £100 every payday
- Audit your last three months of bank statements and cancel what you don’t use
- Sell what you don’t need for a quick cash boost
8 weeks before quitting: Prep for interviews
This is the bit most people leave too late.
If you’ve been in your current role for a while, then you’re probably going to be a little bit rusty when it comes to job interviews. And there’s nothing worse than freezing on the dreaded “tell me about yourself” question five minutes in.
The good news is: Interviewing is a skill, not a personality trait. You can get good at it again; you just need to start prepping early.
The goal isn’t to memorise perfect answers. It’s to walk in knowing your story, knowing your worth, and knowing what you truly want next.
Action steps
- Update your CV, portfolio and LinkedIn, so they reflect where you are now
- Reflect on your top 5 career wins and lows
- Read The Secret Language of Work for done-for-you scripts on how to ace the interview
- Practice answering the classic questions out loud, not just in your head
- Prep 3-5 thoughtful questions to ask them, because interviews go both ways
6 weeks before quitting: Do the mindset work
Even though you’re now financially and physically prepared to quit your job, you need to make sure you’re mentally and emotionally ready, too.
Because no matter how tempting it is to storm out of the office on a random Tuesday afternoon, you need to do the mindset work first.
Leaving the only version of success you’ve ever known is not as easy as it looks.
You need the clarity and confidence it takes to stop second-guessing yourself.
You need the courage and resilience it takes to tackle any obstacles or setbacks that come your way.
You need the belief in yourself to make it happen.
So do not skip this step!
Mindset is the foundation everything else gets built on. Without a resilient mindset, you will simply crumble under the pressure, and fear will continue to run the show.
Journal, repeat affirmations, lean into your strengths, practice gratitude or work with a coach. Do what you need to do to mentally prepare for this moment.
Action steps
- Write down one negative belief you have about quitting, e.g. It feels like I’m failing
- Reflect on where this belief came from
- Challenge this belief by listing all the ways it isn’t true
- Reframe this belief into a more empowering statement
- Repeat this work consistently (even after you’ve quit your job)
4 weeks before quitting: Draft your resignation letter
Okay, things are getting real now.
By this point, you’ve ideally got a new job lined up (or you’re very close), your finances are in order, and you’ve done the mindset work. Which means it’s time to start drafting your resignation.
I know what you’re thinking.
Surely you just write “I quit” and hit send? Tempting, but no. A resignation letter isn’t the place to vent, settle scores, or finally tell Karen from HR what you really think of her.
Keep it short, professional, and unbothered. You don’t owe anyone a lengthy explanation or a list of reasons. A few clear sentences will do the job.
Draft it now, sit on it for a few days, and come back to it with fresh eyes before you actually send it.
Action steps
- Keep it to 3-4 short paragraphs maximum
- State your intention to resign and your last working day clearly
- Thank them for the opportunity (yes, even if you’re glad to be leaving)
- Offer to help with the handover so the transition is smooth
- Save a copy for yourself before you send it
2 weeks before quitting: Hand in your 2 weeks’ notice
Dare I reference another Hugh Grant classic?! Lol. Get it?!
Anyway, this is the moment you’ve been prepping for. Your resignation has been drafted, you’ve signed your new contract, and you’re doing the mindset work.
Now you just need to do the thing.
Book a meeting with your boss, ideally in person (or over a video call if you’re remote). Don’t drop it in a Slack message, don’t ambush them in the kitchen, and please don’t tell your work bestie first. Word travels fast, and the last thing you want is your boss finding out from someone else.
Keep the conversation calm, short, and professional. Thank them for the opportunity, let them know when your last day is, and offer to help with the handover. That’s it. You’re not asking for permission, you’re sharing a decision you’ve already made.
And if they try to counteroffer, have your answer ready before you walk in.
Most counter-offers are just a band-aid solution on a long-term problem, so be clear with yourself about whether more money or a new title would actually change anything.
Action steps
- Book a private meeting with your boss
- Have the conversation in person or over video
- Stick to the script: thank them, share your last day, offer to help with the handover
- Send your resignation letter straight after the conversation, not before
- Decide in advance how you’ll respond to a counteroffer
1 week before quitting: Wrap up your projects, tasks, deadlines, etc.
Your last week is all about leaving things in good shape for whoever comes in after you. You want a smooth transition for your replacement. Trust me on this, you’ll sleep so much better knowing you didn’t leave everything in a mess.
Because how you leave a job only really reflects on you.
Tie up loose ends, document the things only you know, and make the handover as painless as possible.
And don’t forget to enjoy it. This is your last week!!! Take a long lunch, leave on time, and let yourself feel a little bit smug about it.
Action steps
- Finish off any outstanding projects or deadlines
- Write down your processes, logins, and recurring tasks so nothing falls through the cracks
- Brief whoever’s covering your role on anything they need to know
- Say proper goodbyes to the coworkers you actually liked
- Leave on a high, no strings attached, no burnt bridges, no regrets
The TL;DR version
I like to call this the TL;DR version because if you’re already halfway out the office door, you probably got to “signs it’s time to quit” and started skim-reading the rest.
So here are the key takeaways from this post:
Signs it’s time to quit:
- You’re burnt out, anxious, or crying in the office toilets
- You’ve got a bad case of the Sunday Scaries
- You’ve lost confidence and your sense of self
- You’ve outgrown your role, and there’s no room to grow
- You’ve been promised a promotion or raise that never comes
- Your gut is telling you it’s time, even if everything else looks fine
Your 12-week timeline:
- Start applying for new jobs 12 weeks before
- Map out a financial game plan 10 weeks before
- Prep for interviews 8 weeks before
- Do the mindset work 6 weeks before
- Draft your resignation letter 4 weeks before
- Hand in your notice 2 weeks before
- Wrap up your projects 1 week before
Things to avoid:
- Naked quitting with no new job lined up (unless you’re travelling)
- Burning bridges or doing a full-on Bridget Jones
- Accepting a counteroffer without thinking it through properly
- Telling your work bestie you’re quitting before your boss
- Checking out completely in your last few weeks
What to do next:
- Get clear on your values and what you actually want next
- Read The Secret Language of Work for done-for-you scripts
- Build a “leaving fund” so you’ve got a financial cushion
- Do the mindset work so you don’t talk yourself out of it
- Read Stay & Slay™ (the book I wrote) if you’re not quite ready to quit yet
- Watch Bridget Jones for a nostalgic throwback
Final thoughts
Look, I’m not going to pretend that quitting a job is easy.
Mine wasn’t anyway.
I was already burnt out and needed a break, so I genuinely just wanted to get TF out of there. But to top it all off, I had a 3-month notice period to get through.
Yes, three whole months of pretending to care.
But I still left with grace.
I didn’t leave my team in the lurch or burn any bridges in the process. And I can 100% confirm that I didn’t do a Bridget Jones. I kept things professional even though every part of me wanted to scream.
And that’s exactly why I wanted to write this post. Because quitting your job doesn’t have to be messy.
You can be completely done with a job that’s draining the life out of you and still leave on good terms. Those two things aren’t mutually exclusive.
Don’t make things harder than they need to be — for yourself, or others.
You’ve got this.
Thalia xx
